ahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaahhh. (whew)

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Me today.

This is one of my shameless self-indulgence pieces. You are thusly warned.

The Ashburn City Council met last night to take up two pieces of unfinished business: Make an appointment to the Planning & Zoning Board and adopt the budget.

WAKEY WAKEY!

If yer still with me, I must bore you for a moment.

P&Z is round 2 of any zoning and land use application which requires a change to the zoning or formal action by any of the local government boards in my community. Round one is through the Zoning Administrator Mike M. Round 3 is to go before the local elected board which makes the final decision - A City Council or the County Commission.

P&Z only makes recommendations. The final decision rests with the elected board.

Earlier this month Mike approached the City as one of the City's P&Z appointments stepped down. He asked Council to appoint someone.

Prior to the meeting at City Hall this was discussed. Usual procedure. I offered to serve. Come meeting Councilman Art Eld moved to appoint me to the board.

Join the Evolution. This ain't a revolution.

Councilman James Burks asked to hold off to see if anyone else was interested in serving and to see who is already on the board. Why he wanted to know the second bit, he never explained. I have suspicions, none of which are even remotely connected to the "justice" that Mr. Burks constantly demands. But then his concept of "justice" is as malleable as beeswax at 2 p.m. today in my opinion. (Temps expected to be over 100 at 2 p.m. today)

Come last night P&Z was first on the list. Art so moves.

Burks, who has raised the EXACT same objections about me in the past for other appointments said: He is the media. Will this be a conflict of interest?

"I can't see how it will be an issue. He does report on zoning issues, but this group does not make the final decision," replied Mayor Jim Hedges. The mayor also pointed out I serve on other boards, including boards with members appointed by the City Council. "It depends on how many hats you want to wear, Ben."

G'head. Press it. Harder!

For the record I am required, with my job, to be active in my community. I can serve on any board in any capacity I feel comfortable with, excepting I cannot run for elected office. I shan't bore you with the list of local boards I'm on - but you won't find many people who are on more boards. Being on P&Z will actually help me do my job in the long run.

The mayor also pointed out I leave my reporter's hat in the hall when I attend Development Authority meetings.

Mr. Burks did not bother to address me, did not bother to ask me if there was a conflict on interest. Justice? He's never asked me in past meetings, always addressed his comments to the rest of the Council. Anyone else, he'd asked them directly. Why? Keep reading.

Nope. Still don't get it.

"I get exposed from his views. I know the views of others are limited. He is a veteran 20-25 years and he knows how to twist things," Mr. Burks said.

Yeah. Except for that last bit, I don't get it either. But that's common, for me to not understand what Mr. Burks is talking about.

I will note in all his years of serving on Council and being elected (sometimes by very narrow margins) Mr. Burks has been in my office a grand total of three times. He has only once said my reporting of a Council meeting was incorrect (it was not, the Council tapes backed me up).

yeah. crank my tractor baybee!

Other elected officials have come to me in the past for reporting errors. I do make mistakes. They have sent letters to the editor (all published without comment by me) critical of my reporting (but not about mistakes). They have even launched diatribes in open meetings about me and my reporting, (but not about mistakes).

Mistakes make me mad as all git out. Insanely furious, at myself.

I try very hard to present things in news stories as dispassionately and objectively as possible.

But some folks object to the truth.

Ripping my head off because I told the truth and you don't like it? Make my year why doncha? Yeah. I love it. Mmmmm baybee!

As for others with "limited views," I have rejected a grand total of 7 (legit) letters the editor in 16 years here. Those letters were not signed, were ineloquent attacks on another person and very likely would have landed me and the newspaper in court on libel charges. I define legit as written by a reader of my paper or from someone connected to my community or about something my community. I reject out of hand blanket form letters from giant corporations, national heads of political parties and so forth.

Because knowledge is a dangerous thing.

Limited views? Only because people won't send me a letter to the editor and sign it. I firmly believe if you want to use my newspaper to express your point of view, the readers deserve to know who you are. You wanna be anonymous, go ahead. I will help you stay anonymous by not printing your stuff.

Send me a letter. Meet my VERY liberal publishing requirements and I'll run it. Guaranteed.

Councilman Art Eld a few years back referred to Mr. Burks as "intellectually bankrupt." Yeah, I put that in the newspaper, lead story, Page 1.

What is limited here is not "views" but cerebration.

As for knowing "how to twist things" well, yeah, guilty. As a wordmonger of decades of experience with a mental lexicon inferior only to a very small group of people (William F. Buckley leading that list), I can absolutely warp, bend, fold, spindle and mutilate words.

Because idiots are allowed to vote.

My opinion pieces are clearly identified as just that. And, despite what some people think, opinion pieces are supposed to express a point of view, offer an opinion, point out failings and shortcomings and praise where needed. Objectivity is not a part of opinion pieces.

Eh. Whatever. The proof of who is right and who is wrong in this discussion hits the streets in my community every Tuesday afternoon and is on the web sometime each Tuesday at http://www.thewiregrassfarmer.com. You don't like my reporting, cool. Go listen to the council tapes and see how right and how wrong I am. Go talk to the people I interview and see how right and wrong I am.

Then, send me a letter to the editor.

Letters to the editor rock!