Demanding is not accepting

Blogspot is misbehaving. Again. You'll have to imagine cutlines for images. I barely got this to post to begin with.
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This column is NOT what you are expecting, I guarantee. But if you come and read my stuff expecting anything, including sense, I wonder. Anyway...

Sunday morning. Spaghetti sauce cooks on the stove, clothes are washing, NPR is on the radio and I'm working on my new novel.

The show turns to homosexuality. A specific homosexuality. Christian singers who have come out about their same gender preferences and their careers have paid the price for this.

This column is STILL not what you are expecting and you still have my guarantee.

The singers spoke of how they had to make a change in their ministry work because of their orientation. Although it was not said directly, that I can remember anyway, it was certainly inferred that they were increasingly uncomfortable living one public life and one private life.

Betcha I can get a witness or three for that last statement and it doesn't have to be about closet homosexuality either.

It reminded me of something Lamar Lee once said. The Church of God's international headquarters in Cleveland, Tenn. receives a stack of ministerial licenses each month. The licenses are surrendered. The ministers simply cannot live that dual life any more.

One of the Christian singers interviewed by NPR who came out and continued his career in modern sacred music said his concerts have gone from sellout crowds to the point "I'm begging people to come, again." He said attendance dropped by 3/4s.

While it was not directly said, that I can recall, the undercurrent of all the speakers was "Why can't the people who used to accept me, accept me now?" Hold that thought.

One lesbian minister did say "they still love me" but her views on the Bible which she called well-thought out and grounded, are incompatible with the place she used to work. So she launched her a new ministry in which she is openly homosexual.

I have a few questions.

Consider: The people who came out had previously and publicly toed (towed?, whatever) the public line of the ministry in which they participated. Then, they came out. They said they got tired of living a lie.

Ah.

Lemme set aside theology just for a moment. I'll come back to that.

These people "came out" after lying repeatedly and over many years. Why should they be believed now?

Bout dat theology.

These folks who "came out" are asking to be accepted. But, they have announced what is a major change in who they present themselves as. It really is an extremely major change to the Christians to whom the now-public homosexuals are speaking.

Is it fair to ask for blanket acceptance when a person undergoes a fundamental change? Is it fair to reject that person?

By asking to be accepted as a homosexual, the "came out" people are also asking for a major and fundamental change in the Christians. They are asking the Christians to set aside a tenet of their belief. Hang on! Gonna get to that in a moment as well.

Is that fair?

Because you change, I have to change?

If you change and then demand I change, who is being tolerant?

Before you answer that, consider this:

What you may see as a minor matter is an earth-moving matter to me. What may be nothing to me, could be a cosmological shift to you. Position determines perspective.

Why do I have to change if you change?

Is that fair to me?

If I change and demand that you also change, is that fair to you?

If you demand I change, then you give me the right to demand that you change. I just might demand that too.

To restate - Homosexuals who seek and often demand acceptance in the Christian church are demanding a fundamental shift in the beliefs of those Christians.

Is that fair? Is that really seeking acceptance? Or is it a thinly veiled extreme demand couched in a polite phrase?

Lemme sling this by you - To be accepted, one must first accept.

A bit more theology. I understand the primary command of the Bible is love - Agape in the ancient languages of the Bible. I also understand the Bible speaks against homosexuality, but Agape is a much more important commandment.

The Bible also says that while all things are now legal, under Grace, not all things are profitable.

I have no problems with homosexuals. If I ever manage to become a church pastor (about as likely me becoming a lawyer) I will welcome them to the congregation. I will use their skills to better the church. I will seek their counsel. I will make them leaders, if appropriate. I will celebrate and mourn with them. I will not marry them to a person of the same gender.

That last sentence is correct. If the homosexuals are as accepting of me as I am of them, they won't demand I officiate a same gender wedding.

Would I attend such a ceremony as a guest? Mmm, yes. Would I take pictures for them? Sure. Would I serve as a member of the wedding party? Hrm. Gotta say I don't know. I really don't. That's gonna take much more thought.

This is who I am.

I will not demand you change, if you don't demand I change.