The Gross National Debt

Tuesday, November 24, 2015

Slice & dice

As the national day of overeating rapidly approaches, some people are panicking.

They do not know how to carve a turkey.

No problem. I will tell you how. This is very simple.

Get a sharp knife.

Get a turkey. I recommend a fully cooked bird, but hey, whatever floats your gravy boat.

Carve off chunks in whatever size you want.

That's all there is to it. If you hit a bone, either keep cutting through the bone or stop cutting and pull away the meat you cut.

As I write this, I have a quartered deer and a sliced hog (just needs wrapping) in the barn fridge. Tomorrow I will pick up a quartered and boned deer.

I will process these tomorrow with knives I sharpen with a plain file.

Purists are now recoiling in horror. Use a FILE on a good knife? You'll ruin it, they whine.

Cut cabbage from the stalk in a for 8 hours a day and come back to talk with me about ruining a knife by using a file to sharpen it.

I've cut up more animals from small enough to hold in one hand and almost hide it to nearly a ton than most people in the world. I've dressed enough fish to ... damfino. I have worn out a few knives and lost a lot more.

I have yet to ruin a knife by putting an edge on it with a file.

Files work. They work faster than a whetstone, sharpening sticks or anything else I have ever used. That is why I use 'em.

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