The good therein

 Lessons learned today and thanks to lessons from the past, hey!, all is good.

The food bank crew borrowed my truck to use as part of a caravan to head out and bring back as much food as possible. Good enough,

I do state here I had misgivings. Perhaps it was God speaking to me. Perhaps it was general unease. Perhaps it was a combination of factors based on my years of experience in this thing we call life. I had a solid hunch my truck was not coming back all the way.

Yep.

They made it back. Without my truck.

I walked down to the FB, did not see my truck. I inquired as to where it was.

On the side of the road about 15 miles away. Transmission blew a seal.

They got back to the food bank, unloaded a truck and went back to get the trailer hooked to my truck. Or, they called someone to get that trailer and pull it in. Not clear on what exactly happened there. It does not matter.

I am clear that my truck was left on the side of a very rural road. I was not told about this either. This does not matter.

I had the foresight, this morning, to remove some of the items I had in it. The others I left, expecting to unload them this evening. What the items are, is irrelevant. 

A few years ago, I would have exploded. I'd have stormed off swearing. I'da left many hurt feelings in my considerable wake.

This time, I was upset. I did swear, but kept that to myself. I kept hoping someone would ask me about the truck so I could explain a few things. No one did, so I wound up volunteering some information.

That was a mistake. No one needed to know what I said. The information solved no problem. It did not establish any grounds for improving the future. 

As anxiety wore at me, I quit unloading stuff and called for a ride to get to my truck. A stop at the auto parts place. My emotions continued to roil and rule and as a result, I wound up buying a jug of antifreeze instead of transmission fluid.

I caught the mistake after an ounce or two went in. My ride returned to town to get actual transmission fluid. No worries, It leaked out fast enough. Also, I needed to top off the radiator anyway so it was also good.

I sat on the tailgate waiting for the return. Of all the people who passed me - the hood on the truck was up, a universal sign of vehicle distress - only one person stopped to help. He even pointed to his house just up the road and said if I needed help, come get him.

The world needs more people like that. I am trying to be that person.

I fiddled with my phone and thought on the lessons from the Stoics. Their words were already running through me. As we rode out to my waiting truck, I said several times, "There is good in this. I just have to find it." I meant that. I mean that. I will continue to believe it.

I staggered the truck back to the house. It will be collected in the morning by the repair shop.

I have learned some lessons and had some reinforced. To enumerate in no particular order-

• Getting PO'd solves little and often makes matters worse.
• What is done is in the past and cannot be changed.
• Learn from what happened and try to not let it happen again.
• Pay attention to that small, quiet voice that speaks to what may will happen.
• What you seek, you will absolutely find. Look for the good.

One lesson learned, not loaning my truck out any more except to a very select few people. Understand I do not fault anyone in the caravan. The transmission likely would have gone out even if I was driving. What makes the situation different is me and only me. I'da stayed with the truck until it was brought back, the owner contacted and he advised what to do or he arrived. This is me and no one else. I should not expect others to act as I do nor should I hold any ill will because they do not.

And, I do not. What happened is in the past. To move forward is what matters. 

That which cannot be avoided must be endured.

Likely the transmission is fried to a crisp. So be it. I am without a vehicle, uncertain how to pay for the transmission work and so forth. This is good. It has to be.

I shall find the good therein.